It doesn’t look like that on TV

March 10th, 2010 Writing, screen

The last shoot before we wrap – oooh I feel so important using that word – was to be of me and V getting smashed in the face with cream cake. This was something we saw on the French and Saunders Christmas Special. When the cast finally came into the room, the cream that was at first cold and stiff had become a coolish puddle. After explaining the hilarious plan, instead of an enthusiastic spring for the plate of melted cream and cake, the cast began a long discussion about where to stand, who to put cake on the face first, etc. By the time they picked up the cream and cake to actually press my face into it, and the cream had grown bubbles.

Hamish and Dougal – Musical Evening

February 12th, 2010 Writing, radio

I’m writing down the script for Hamish and Dougal to learn how to write comedy. I’m writing a skit. So far, it is too risque because of its visual gags which means it could be scrapped and I’ve got a timeline to meet. Hamish & Dougal is a laugh every other second.

[Door Opens]
Hamish!
Dougal!
You’ve had your tea!
No…
As a matter of fact I’ve just finished mine!
Mine too, by the looks of it.
I’ll be looking forward to your company later on.
How will that be Dougal?
Hamish, I’m having a musical evening!
Ah…I’m the same after a baked bean supper
An entertainment! Jinks! What fun we’ll have!
There will be hijinks on the Glen as we speak!
I don’t doubt it!
I’m bursting to know, what on earth have you laid on?
I don’t know but it’s stained the back of my kilt
No….
No no. The entertainment.
Oh, a rare treat Hamish! Did you ever see the Edinburgh tattoo?
Oh, I glimsped it once when you were changing your sporran.
I am talking about the great national spectacle.
So am I!
Oh what am I thinking of.  Come away, man, rest your weary feet, pull up a chair, there is one in the celler.
[Sheep bleats.]
Glory be! What was that!
Oh, I’m in the middle of making a haggis.
That’s handy, I’ve just been to the bakers. Could you fancy a bannercake?
I could, old friend, but would I respect it in the morning?
That’s what you got to ask yourself.

Travelling to a parellel universe

January 25th, 2010 Writing

Saturday, I hit on a marvelous idea of sending my MC into a “piao-liao” universe where the story begins. I’m really disappointed that one way travel to a parallel universe requires a lot of energy.

A decision was made….

January 15th, 2010 Writing

A decision was made to go to the woods because of a desire for a deliberate existence and for exposure to only the essential facts of life, and for possible instruction in its educational elements, and because of a concern that at the time of my death the absence of a meaningful prior experience would be apprehended.

Hilarious! What he was butchering was :

I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of nature, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.

And other good tips found here

1. The words derived from Latin are the enemy—they will strangle and suffocate everything you write. The Anglo-Saxon words will set you free.
   Clarity. If it’s not clear you might as well not write it. You might as well stay in bed.
2. Simplicity. Simple is good.Writing is not something you have to embroider with fancy stitches to make yourself look smart.
3. Brevity. Short is always better than long. Short sentences are better than long sentences. Short words are better than long words.
4. Humanity. Be yourself. Never try in your writing to be someone you’re not. Your product, finally, is you. Don’t lose that person by putting on airs, trying to sound superior.
5. You can solve most of your writing problems if you stop after every sentence and ask: What does the reader need to know next?”…One thought per sentence…There’s no sentence too short to be acceptable.

Supernatural + Plotting

January 14th, 2010 Writing, screen

I am so hooked on Supernatural I’m reading fandom essays on the show. This meta about the brothers and the plotline of Supernatural has very useful writing advice.

A character’s motivation is rooted in plot and plot spins directly out of a character’s needs and desires. So plot and characterization are like a snake swallowing its tail, where one ends the other begins. And Sam and Dean’s relationship with the story and their conflict tiger roles illustrate the circular-nature of this debate perfectly. More than anything, this story is about two brothers who are fundamentally different but work together all the same. And I think the same is true for how Sam and Dean are tied to the plot and how their characterization is dealt with. Each are accomplished in different ways and delivered through different means, but somehow they compliment each other and are used in tandem to forward the story.

Q&A on Writing

January 14th, 2010 Writing

From reddit IAmA *New York Times* Bestselling Novelist thanks to keyist

How long did it take to get your first book published? At what point (if ever) did you quit a day job to pursue novel writing full time?

Took me ten-plus years, which is pretty typical. There’s a saying in this business: “It takes ten years to become an overnight success.” I quit my day job about the time my second novel came out.

IAmA NYT novelist as well — good for you, I have the same career track, only it took me about 15 years to reach true success. I’ve got 30+ books out and I still haven’t managed to quit my day job. That insurance coverage is powerfully addictive stuff.

Almost every successful musician, author and actor that I know(and I know more than a few) has been at it for ~10 years at the bare minimum, with ~15 being more common. It is perhaps one of the hardest things for young artists to grasp that success takes a long time and along the way you might not have any reassurance that you’re even on the right track. Just gotta keep at it, keep getting better and do what is best for your work.

How do you write? I suck at writing. For example, say that I’m trying to write about winter. I’d write: “The weather is cold and the ground is covered with snow”. Exciting, huh? How do you get the creative juice flowing? What’s the process of writing a single good sentence like? Do you write whatever’s on your mind first, then come back to revise each sentence? In contrary, do you give a lot of thought on each sentence before writing it? I want to know how to write, but for the life of me I just can’t.

Everything you need to excel in fiction-writing can be learned. Except for loving it. If you don’t love it, you probably won’t succeed. As for books to improve your mechanics, I’d recommend Gary Provost. He’s got a number of How-To books on the subject.

Creative juices: It’s like anything else. The more you practice creativity, writing, plotting, etc., the better you’ll get at it. Later, I’ll be posting some brainstorming tools that have helped me.

Because I’m always on a deadline, I now edit as I write, but that’s a skill that took many, many years to develop. The best way to do it is get everything down on paper without worrying about how it sounds, or looks, or whether you’ve misused a semi-colon, then go back and re-write. Writing is rewriting.

You can do it. It just takes dedication and a willingness to suck at it until you don’t suck at it anymore.

~

I really like this found here:

Chekhov was, by profession, a doctor. He also became one of the best drama and prose writers ever (in the west, he’s best known for plays, but his prose is brilliant, too).

About having two professions, he said “Medicine is my lawful wife and literature my mistress; when I get tired of one, I spend the night with the other.” Anyway, I guess I’d say you should do both. If your writing takes off and you get famous, you can quit your day job.

The other option, I’d say, is to become a high school English teacher or an English professor. That way you’d have all summer to write. But trust me, poverty sucks and it really sucks to have debt collectors calling you; and it sucks when you start trying to time which bills you pay because you can’t pay them all. It double sucks when you have a family.